Bog Bother The Election

Channel 9 has pulled the rug out from under the ABC, and in a dramatic challenge to Channel 10, is going ahead with plans for Bog Bother the Election.

Although details are sketchy Bog Bother the Election will screen nightly on Channel 9 with a one hour Eviction Special to be screened on Sunday nights.

A Channel 9 spokeswoman confirmed negotiations for the show had been in the pipeline for some time. "It will revolutionise Australian politics," she said. "The ABC has been screening Question Time late at night, we see this as much more important. The Government agrees with us."

In a move that is sure to boost ratings even more, the Eviction Special will be hosted by Pauline Hanson, who is delighted to be back and doing what she does best — annoying politicians.

Channel 9 will not build a special house for the members. They will make use of the existing parliament house and just add cameras in all the other rooms.

Each week the backbench would select 3 members to be evicted. Viewers would have the final vote.

" Not only will private enterprise be sponsoring the whole thing, but it will eliminate the need for costly elections," said the Channel 9 spokeswoman.

"It is a wonderful system because it will ensure each member of the house is keen to not only be seen to be pulling their weight but will actually get out and do something to ensure they are not voted out."

Psychologists and therapists will be on hand to council members and ensure they cope with the increased stress and strain.

Anyone would be eligible to enter the house but would have to pass a rigorous audition process held in every electorate. This open and transparent audition process will mean an end to branch stacking and backroom deals.

The spokesperson agreed it was in effect privatising government. "We don't believe the Australian people will have a problem with that as they have already seen everything else privatised."

The Government is pleased with the idea and is already counting the ways to spend money generated by advertising on government web sites.

Democrat leader Natasha Stott Despoja is thrilled with the idea, but warned Democrats not to trivialise the show. "Australians will get more than bunny ears and bum dancing from us," she said.

Head of the ABC Jonathan Shier, furious that the ABC once again missed out on a ratings bonanza has reportedly sacked another 10 staff.